


Interview with a 4-Month Old

by NerdKenz2001



Series: La Guardia Cross Based [2]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker is Tony Stark's Biological Child, Peter is a Little Shit, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:13:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23882818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NerdKenz2001/pseuds/NerdKenz2001
Summary: Again, Tony interviews his child.
Relationships: Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: La Guardia Cross Based [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1651438
Comments: 3
Kudos: 112





	Interview with a 4-Month Old

The video starts off with Tony Stark coming into frame and sitting down on a computer chair. “Peter! How ya doing!”

Peter Stark, now Four-months, sat on a leather chair with a onesie that said “My Daddy is my SuperHero!” and he was babbling with text appearing next to him saying, _“I’m good.”_

”I’m glad to hear that. I got a question, right?” Tony leaned down to face his young son. “I always wanted to know, why do babies, like around your age, put everything in their months?”

_”I don’t know about any of that!”_ Peter babbled and then put his little fist into his mouth. 

“But I just...I just saw you put your entire fist in your mouth.” 

Peter quickly removed his tiny baby fist from his mouth. _“Huh?”_

Tony laughed. “Don’t you try to be slick, I’m just...I just saw you!”

_”Liar!”_ Peter babbled as he threw his little fist at his daddy. 

“Boy, I’m like, right in front of you! I see what you are doing!” Peter “rolled” his eyes and text appeared over top of him that said “oh my gah”. Tony just sighed and shook his head. “You just-You just did it again!”

Tony stare at Peter and raised an eyebrow at his son. “Are you chewing on the side of my couch?”

Baby Peter was facing away from the camera as his toothless-mouth chewed on the side of his father’s couch. It’s not like he was doing any real harm to the leather-couch, but too much of this would most likely discolor the leather. _“I have a problem.”_

The screen cuts to a new scene where Tony takes out a baby wipe. “Are you afraid of a cold wet wipe?”

_”I’m ok.”_

”What about baths?” Tony held up some cleaning supplies, such as Scrubbing Bubbles and Clorox. 

_“I’m good.”_

Now, for some reason, Tony had a baby doll in his arms ”Okay, so let’s just say that hypothetically fall asleep in my arms and so I decided to lay you down on the couch-“

The camera cuts to a whiny Peter “screaming” at his father. Tony reacted by throwing the baby doll in his arms and barely catching it. “Okay, I’m sorry. Uh, lay you down gently-“

Peter screaming again and Tony threw the doll again as well as barely catching it. “Uh- You’re sitting on the couch right now. I don’t understand why you would be afraid of me just gently-“

Again. The baby genius screamed and this time, Tony did not catch the doll when it was thrown.

“I don’t get it.” Sad music started to play as he talked. “what about me? What about the things that daddy’s afraid of? You’re over fifteen pounds! Okay, I’m afraid of my arms cramping up. I’m afraid of my legs falling asleep.”

Peter just laughed at his daddy.

”S-stop it! Have you ever tried to lay a fifteen pound dumbbell on your thigh for two hours straight? That doesn’t feel good! It’s hard to- I- I feel like I don’t even own my own body-“

Peter continue to laugh.

”Stop laughing at me...!” Tony started to pretend cry as the next next to baby Peter said for him to continue. “How come every time I try to fall asleep, you start waking up? I mean, you just sit there-“

When Peter continued laughing, Tony ran out the room but before he could reach the door he fell. 

The camera cuts to Tony back in his seat, looking at Peter. “Before we continue, I need you to promise me...to respect...my feelings!”

” _Alright!”_

”Okay, saw you and Dum-E chatting it up the other day.” 

The video cuts to a clip of baby Peter babbling to Dum-E and Butterfingers as well as clapping. When it cuts back to the two Starks, they were both laughing. “Yeah that was pretty funny wasn’t it? So, what exactly was he laughing at? I mean, I reviewed the video hundreds of times! And I can’t decipher your words! What exactly was he laughing at?”

” _I don’t know.”_

”I know your game! You rarely ever are quiet at the same time! Trying to keep us on our toes! When one beeps, the other one beeps! When one gets messy, the other one gets messy! Just admit it! You’re plotting against us! Aren’t you?!”

Peter decided to make more baby noises at his father. _“I’m innocent!”_

”I don’t believe you.”

” _I am!”_

”Where’s Dum-E right now? Where’s he at?”

_”I haven’t seen him!”_

”Liar!”

” _I want a lawyer!”_

”Why do you need a lawyer if you’re telling the truth?” Tony gave him a wide grin and put his head on his hands as he stared at his young son. 

_I wanna get outta here!”_

Tony seemed to finally snapped because she started laughing evilly as he rubbed his hands together. Although he stopped when he started choking on his own spit. “Al-alright. If you wanna go, just go. I’m not holding you here. No one’s stopping you.”

Peter just stared at his father as he tipped over onto his face. 


End file.
